I have only lived in New York for about nine years, so I'm not really in a position to decide who gets to be a New Yorker or not, but my vote would be to deport these people from the state. We'll take more Syrian refugees, and the governor of Texas can grow fat neon bagels for breakfast.

Via Business Insider. Hat tip to my sister in law, who lives in Ottawa with direct access to the incredible Montreal-style bagel, and should know better than to be enthused by this culinary travesty.